Mail Bag

Have a look at a few of the emails and comments I have received after each blog. I hope you enjoy these as much as I do.

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via Reblog

ARMYCHI******

YOURE SNOBBY FOR SAYING THAT. THERES TONS OF "POOR" PEOPLE WHO MAKE IT SUCCESSFUL IN LIFE. I'M ONE OF THEM . IF I WERE YOU I' d THINK BEFORE YOU SPEAK. Rude PPL LIKE YOU ARE UNATTRACTIVE.


Congrats ArmyC, you clearly “make it successful in life”. I was wrong. Now I’m embarrassed in front of all of my friends.


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via Gmail

Ta****** 12:25 PM

just read it
i love it
i now judge them by the level of hatred --- super hating you

Ta***** 12:28 PM

and wanting you
drives me crazy how they go together like that

2 points me.

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via Hotmail

Am**********

I don’t know who you are. But I know what you stand for. You are the reason that people don’t get ahead in life. You are the reason that women feel BAD about how they look. What gives you the right to judge. Do you think because you are SOOOOO RICh that you decide how everything should be? Well wake up. The best things in life are not young girls and nice clothes. I hope someday you grow up. Prick.


Me: I’ll take things in life for $800

Alex: Answer: Young girls and nice clothes.

Me: What are the best things

Alex: Correct for $800

Nice try Trebek

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via comment section on my blog

D****

While your blog is somewhat funny, it would be a very interesting social experiment to see what would happen if you ever moved to a real city. If you are around enough 6's you may feel like a 10 in comparison, but what if you upped the ante and were around a larger portion of the best and the brightest? It would be interesting to see how your observations, rhetoric, and swagger would hold up and whether the substance underneath is really as strong as your writing makes it seem

J******
Bro, you just got served!!!

I did in fact, get served. The good news: I know that I will never take public transportation.
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via comment section on my blog

Wasb*************

oh my gosh.. my mom and I about pissed our pants reading that.. and i read a bunch of the others.. You are too funny! Write more.. i need a weekly laugh from you!

Mother AND daughter pissing themselves at the same time!?! Someone read my diary.

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via Hotmail

BL*********

FUCK YOU

Short and to the point. Well-done.
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via comment section on my blog


C*****

I'm a breasts man. Typically girls with large breast eat healthy, so I say have all the chips you want as long as I can have some milk.

This makes me glad people only have my email and not my address.
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via Gmail

K***********
If your picture is really you in your Blog profile then you can saw what ever you want. PS im 20 is that too old?

Sorry I never got back to you. A few follow up questions.
1. Do you have an opinion?
2. Pearls and a sweater?
3. Is everything clearly defined for you as an “entry” or an “exit”?

The Draft

Get your pen and paper ready. You’ve heard of March Madness, well next month is May Madness. All the hottest recruits will be reviewing scholarship offers, weighing their opportunities and making their announcement. This time of year always gets me going. Last year’s draft went well but this year the sky is the limit.

The typical recruit comes in freshman year with little “big game” experience. They don’t know the playbook or the new rules of the game. This is a whole new league. Quotes such as:

“I don’t know this move”
“I’ve never worked this hard”
“Is that legal?”

can be heard from all of the newbie’s.

That’s right everyone. It is the High School Draft. Girls from all over the country will decide what higher leaning facility will allow them the best opportunity to meet a man and become engaged by end of the third season. With their championship ring and MRS degree attained in just 3 short years they will have time for more important things like learning how to pour a scotch and making me a sandwich.

This is not an easy league though. There is stiff competition (ha ha ha I said “stiff”). Yes, you may have a cable knit and a 3 series but so does the next girl. What sets you apart?

You were on the dance team in High School? Your dad never hugged you? You don’t understand what’s the big deal about a blow job?

Did you just say you are walking to your car alone later? You just became a first round pick.

Just a heads up to the rookies. Play hard. Impress the other team. But don’t get injured freshman year. No one signs a long term contract with a girl that has played for the competition.

Last thing, please do all of us coaches a favor. When you ask for graduation gifts, put monogrammed pillow cases at the top of the list. We need to at least have a good shot at remembering the name of all the players on our team.