Get your pen and paper ready. You’ve heard of March Madness, well next month is May Madness. All the hottest recruits will be reviewing scholarship offers, weighing their opportunities and making their announcement. This time of year always gets me going. Last year’s draft went well but this year the sky is the limit.
The typical recruit comes in freshman year with little “big game” experience. They don’t know the playbook or the new rules of the game. This is a whole new league. Quotes such as:
“I don’t know this move”
“I’ve never worked this hard”
“Is that legal?”
can be heard from all of the newbie’s.
That’s right everyone. It is the High School Draft. Girls from all over the country will decide what higher leaning facility will allow them the best opportunity to meet a man and become engaged by end of the third season. With their championship ring and MRS degree attained in just 3 short years they will have time for more important things like learning how to pour a scotch and making me a sandwich.
This is not an easy league though. There is stiff competition (ha ha ha I said “stiff”). Yes, you may have a cable knit and a 3 series but so does the next girl. What sets you apart?
You were on the dance team in High School? Your dad never hugged you? You don’t understand what’s the big deal about a blow job?
Did you just say you are walking to your car alone later? You just became a first round pick.
Just a heads up to the rookies. Play hard. Impress the other team. But don’t get injured freshman year. No one signs a long term contract with a girl that has played for the competition.
Last thing, please do all of us coaches a favor. When you ask for graduation gifts, put monogrammed pillow cases at the top of the list. We need to at least have a good shot at remembering the name of all the players on our team.
The typical recruit comes in freshman year with little “big game” experience. They don’t know the playbook or the new rules of the game. This is a whole new league. Quotes such as:
“I don’t know this move”
“I’ve never worked this hard”
“Is that legal?”
can be heard from all of the newbie’s.
That’s right everyone. It is the High School Draft. Girls from all over the country will decide what higher leaning facility will allow them the best opportunity to meet a man and become engaged by end of the third season. With their championship ring and MRS degree attained in just 3 short years they will have time for more important things like learning how to pour a scotch and making me a sandwich.
This is not an easy league though. There is stiff competition (ha ha ha I said “stiff”). Yes, you may have a cable knit and a 3 series but so does the next girl. What sets you apart?
You were on the dance team in High School? Your dad never hugged you? You don’t understand what’s the big deal about a blow job?
Did you just say you are walking to your car alone later? You just became a first round pick.
Just a heads up to the rookies. Play hard. Impress the other team. But don’t get injured freshman year. No one signs a long term contract with a girl that has played for the competition.
Last thing, please do all of us coaches a favor. When you ask for graduation gifts, put monogrammed pillow cases at the top of the list. We need to at least have a good shot at remembering the name of all the players on our team.
1 comment:
whats your deal with young girls lol.. anyways, of course it was great! But, I'm afraid I liked the ruby tuesday post better!! Haha
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